Easter Finds Multiply like Rabbits

Usually we only find enough weird stuff for one post, but lucky you, it’s two this year.  The good news is that they will be shorter posts–we know everyone is busy right now what with the holiday and warmer (hopefully) weather.We just have one rule for Easter: There is no such thing as too much candy, especially chocolate!

We both like to read children’s books, even as supposed grownups.  One of our favorites is Bunnicula:

Bunnicula

Well, here he is to the life!  It even looks like he has fangs sunk into the carrot!  My goodness, that poor little carrot must be quaking all the way down to its roots.  If I didn’t have a soft spot for Bunnicula, there is no way I would have this evil bunny near my garden, much less delivering a basket of candy.  His mean looks might curdle milk chocolate.  He even looks evil from the side:

Bunicula is garden artThis picture is just to prove that there’s art out there for every taste, even if it’s only “garden art”.  Seeing these pictures kind of makes me sad I didn’t buy Bunnicula.  Maybe he would scare the real rabbits that are infesting my yard, torturing my drip tubing and the garden.

Here’s Bunnicula’s absolute opposite:

Ahh, Look at that little faceYou know he wouldn’t terrify innocent veggies in your refrigerator, nor would your cat or dog be worried about him hopping about the house.  Honestly, he is just too adorable in that so-sweet-your-teeth-ache sort of way.  But, you could definitely turn your back on him and not have to worry.

I’m not sure what exactly is going on with this covered dish:

Rabbit in the haystack covered dish

For starters, I don’t think it’s all that attractive as a decorative piece.  There are so many cute bunny candy dishes out there that would make better Easter trimmings.  The hay wagon is kind of clunky, the painting could be better, and what do bunnies and hay wagons have to do with each other anyway?

Haystack Rabbit why are you covering your child's eyes?

We also noticed that the mother bunny on top of the hay is hiding her child’s eyes.  It didn’t make much sense until we saw the child on the ground about to be smushed under the tires (see above picture).  No one wants to witness that!  No, we didn’t set that up; just more antics by those humorous thrift store workers creating quirky vignettes on the shelves.  Of course, if this were sitting in your living room, you would have to make sure to buy the child under the tires, too.

This is our kind of bunny:

Our kind of bunny

Full of helpful advice–eat jellybeans and save rabbits?  Sign us up!  It kind of reminds me of the old joke:

For Codd

Oh the life of a chocolate rabbit!

This plate tries sooo hard to be a charming and old-fashioned:

Trying so hard to be old and fun

The bunnies have strange heads; there’s just something wrong about them.  Oh well, it’s not good enough to be decorative, or decorative enough to be good.  I’m not wasting my money; the world is full of much nicer things.

The thrift store has a huge wall of stuffed animals:

Good and Bad

The bunny with a human mouth is super creepy.  Why would they put human-colored plastic flesh on a stuffed animal?  I also cannot figure out the deal with the little pink button nose either.  If you wanted a stuffed animal, why wouldn’t you pick the little dog with the rabbit ears in the upper left corner?  He’s adorable!

It seems to be the Easter for angry rabbits:

Pissed off bunny

If we hadn’t found the “Garden Art” rabbit at the beginning of the post, this might be our choice for Bunnicula.  That narrowed-eye Clint Eastwood gaze seems to be saying, “What the heck are you looking at?” or “Move along, nothing to see here!”.  He looks like one of  those bunnies who could stare down a rattlesnake without breaking a sweat.  Glad I’m not a carrot!

We’re frequently jealous of clothes and boots they make for kids (probably because we’re overgrown kids ourselves) and we want this boot in our size:

I want these my size

Who wouldn’t feel like splashing around on a rainy day if you had duck feet?  It might even make you look forward to a real downpour!  You could stomp puddles, quack, and probably gather a few worried glances; sounds like fun to me!

Thanks for reading, and come back for Kathy’s post next week.  She’s going to show you some homemade Easter trouble!

 

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Over the Top

Congratulations to Terri for winning the hanky giveaway–use it in good health!

It’s usually a “good thing” when folks go above and beyond.  How happy are you with a “baker’s dozen”, the wait staff who takes extra care of your kids, that mechanic who doesn’t charge you an arm and a leg for something simple?  Well, we have some examples this week that prove there really is a line that can be crossed over.  Not that we are advocating against those wonderful extras, we just think these folks could have stopped a little sooner.

Take this little souvenir for example:

That's what I call flair!No matter how hard you look at it, it’s still a tacky souvenir plate to hang on your wall, but did we really need the 3-D ruffled skirt to catch all the extra dust? You gotta give the dancer full marks for trying to make the fashion work, but even her partner seems a bit put off by the whole look.  Yeah, Yeah, I know, Flamenco dancers are supposed to look that way, but I still say they look pissed.

Here is an example of the Energizer Bunny of decorating things:

Decals and crochet cannot save these platesFirst they tried adding decals to the plates.  Nope, not quite there.  I know, let’s put some crochet around the edges.  Hmm.  Still needs something.  Hey, how about some rickrack?  Cause everything looks better with rickrack.  Or maybe not.  It might have helped if the decals had less orange and more red to match the crochet, or maybe they should have just left the plates white and put some cake on them.  Pretty sure most folks would prefer that, unless she really couldn’t cook, or it was fruitcake.

While we are speaking of crafting, we found this little lady this past week:

I'm hiding something under my skirt!She kind of made us giggle, and you know how we are about dolls.  About that time, Deb tired to move her to take a photo, and noticed she was hiding a deep dark secret:

How dare you!Yes, her B.O. was so bad, it took a whole air freshener for it!  You know, I never thought those Renuzits were all that decorative, so this was probably better.  But maybe you should just clean the house with some nice lemon juice, and skip the whole thing.

Of course, if you are embarking on a spring cleaning binge, this is never going to help:

Mop angelHere we have your basic, bug-eyed, feather-winged, mop angel.  Just what everyone needs.  I don’t know what they were going for.  Trying to make a doll, or disguising the mop and hoping the housework goes away?  Maybe they were just hoping the good floor-cleaning fairy would smile on them, and scrub the floor.  At least, if all else fails with this, you can fasten it to a pole and mop the tile.  What a novel idea.

We both come from the school of overoptimistic gardeners (Is there any other kind in CO?), so we love garden art.  It makes up for the color that we lose every time Mother Nature lets loose with a hailstorm just when all our favorite pretty things are coming into bloom.  But … we draw the line here:

Happiness is a ladybug?Happiness is a fake rock with ladybugs?  I think not.  We like ladybugs, might go so far as to even love them (once had a whole bevy of them clear up the aphids on a hibiscus that I had totally despaired of), so much so that we would never fill them up with fake jewels and put them on a rock.  Best you could do with this one would be to tie a threatening letter to it and chuck it through a window, although I don’t advise it.

Lake Tahoe is a gorgeous place, which just happens to have gambling, so this is the memory you bring home?

They must have been drunk when they bought thisSeriously, why didn’t you gamble your money away, rather than buy this?  Go to the edge of the lake and throw the money into it.  Lose it while hiking in the beautiful mountain areas near by. Take yourself to dinner.  Heck, give it to a passerby and let them gamble it away.  It didn’t work, so we have no idea what it played, but I am praying it was “Something Stupid”.  For the record, I love this song, but the title just works here, plus, if you watch the video, you got a Smothers Brothers extra.

This next item falls into our WTF category:

Throw them both backAnd it only gets worse, as you travel around to the dark side:

Throw them both back2Are we supposed to believe that the fish fought so hard he bit out the back of his pants, or does he just always fish in that attire?  We are pretty sure why his wife sent him out to fish.  Who would want that around the house?  I guess you have to be happy he is not coming home empty-handed.  There will be a heck of a fish fry tonight, but I would say he is already to sozzled to care.  We think the world would be an infinitely better place if this had never been made.  We could break this one, but you know there were more of them, and they are probably not extinct yet.  Maybe not even on the endangered species list.

All righty, I think you all have suffered enough, so here is your reward for slogging through the weekly rubbish:

Paint and ColorAre these just about the cutest graphics you have ever seen?  The coloring pages inside were not that cute, and it was missing the “handy plastic tray of paints and crayons”, so we didn’t bring it home, but it sure made us smile.  Showing my age by saying that this would have about made my month as a kid.  Does anyone color any more?

Here’s hoping that spring is coming to your area, and that all your finds are good ones.  If not, you know where to send the photos.

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Much Ado About Everything!

Well, what a difference a week makes!  Spring is just around the corner and the days are warmer, sunnier, and longer.  The crocuses are up all over the yard and my pussy willows are popping:

Croci        Poppin Pussies

Plus, my snowdrops survived single-digit temperatures and snow to look as lovely as ever:

Snowdrops

Of course you know that we get most of our snow in March and April ’round these parts, so you enjoy the sun and warm while you gots it.

Don’t forget to post a comment here or on our Facebook page to enter the drawing for this  hanky:

Give away Hankie

I’ll draw names around 9pm on March 13th.  The winners will be notified by email and we’ll post a note on Facebook and to next week’s bloggy offering.

One of our readers, Steph, sent us a picture and shared a story after our hanky post last week.  It’s so sweet that we would like to share it with you.  Thanks Steph!

So my Dad once sent me an old hankie – with violets – or as he saw them, pansies – on it, with a note that said, “Steph – The little, purple pansy “hanky” may be suitable for setting off a small piece of china or silver or glassware in your display, or as a shawl for one of your larger, more mature Barbie dolls. Only a “Doll” about my age would carry an item like this for everyday use.
Some day, when you are old enough to understand (and forgive) such aberrant behavior, I will tell you (only in conditions of absolute secrecy) how I came to possess the purple, lavender and green handkerchief. Speaking of crying, Grampa Ralph passed away 25 years ago, April 19th. How I miss him!!! Much Love, Dad”

My Dad had a wonderful sense of humor – so you can hear his smiles and laughter in what he wrote. He never did tell me the story of the purple, lavender and green hankie. I’ve had it on my dresser ever since. In my drawers is a handkerchief from my husband’s father, and a hankie I carried on my wedding day. But this one is on my dresser to see every day, and every day I wonder who gave it to him.

Steph's hankyWe think we know all about our parents, but they have their private lives too!  My husband and a good friend both found out that their mothers had been married before marrying their fathers.  The surprising part of this is that their mothers told them when they (hubby and friend) were in their fifties, and there hadn’t been a whiff of the story before then.  For the record, my mother denies a previous marriage–of course I asked her!

On to our regularly scheduled post.  I need to use the wayback machine and find the pictures that have been moldering on the shelf lo these many weeks:

Don't leave me alone with him  Help!

The poor owl sure looks disturbed by the blocky, wooden saber-toothed cat head next to him.  My, what big teeth you have, Grandma!

Imagine our surprise a couple of weeks later when this owl appeared on a nearby shelf:

another wooden owl

We kind of like these ’70s owls; they make us laugh!  But, they’re never comin’ home with us.  We need another collection like we need more holes in our heads.  Of course, when we find something irresistible you know we’ll cave with scarcely a whimper.

These two coffee cups even look fast:

Even the cups look fast

They were fun, but here’s another thing we need like a hole in the head!  Cups and saucers abound in our cupboards, so these stylish German-made ones will have to go home with someone else.

Oh, it wouldn’t be nearly spring without a bad fake flower, fake bird arrangement:

Nice basket bad arrangement

This surely demonstrates Kathy’s favorite saying, “One of everything except taste!”  There is a fun basket in amongst all that frou frou, but I’m not going prospecting.

We did kind of like this Royal Haeger serving tray:

Orange Vintage Tray    Orange Tray

Royal Haeger did make a lot of orange mid-century modern pieces and this could well be one of them.  It must be a kind of rare because I only saw one with a Google search, and there was no information associated with the picture.  If you like Royal Haeger and would like to see some awesomely cool pieces, click here.

This vintage robe/house dress is nowhere near as cool as the tray above:

Polyester Robe     Robe tag

I think the tag was our favorite part!  The tag acts like no one has ever seen polyester before: “… feels truly more comfortable [debatable], … washes truly more clean, … stays truly more bright [true!], … stays fresh and clean”.  How sad that no one has ever worn this modern marvel!

We saw this cute little vintage frame, but were rather startled by the picture:

Vintage Rasberry picture

I know this is supposed to be a luscious pile of golden raspberries, but it is either badly faded or tinted.  At first glance, I thought it was a bunch of icky maggots or grubs, but that’s just me.  Needless to say, neither of us dragged this home.

You know how much we hate clowns–well, here’s a clown purse:

Clown purse?The corduroy was pieced with outside hems that were then pinked for more interest.  There are two flowers, one on each side–purple and pink!  And then, those giant striped handles were the last straw!  If you carried that purse, you would just need some giant shoes and a red nose to make your costume complete.

This piece of clothing on the other hand is pretty cool:

Bob Mackie does Sunflowers   Bob Mackie wearable art

Kathy likes to wear a button-down shirt over another shirt, especially in the spring and fall.  Imagine our surprise to find a Bob Mackie shirt at the thrift store.  The sunflowers are big and bold, but that’s okay since it’s “wearable art”.  The embroidery is very well done, and the shirt doesn’t even look like it’s been worn much.  Kathy snapped it right up, and I’m sure it’ll look super cute on a Friday morning.

We’re going to be on the road separately over the next couple of weeks.  Kathy is taking a cruise with her mom, and I’m going to Florida.  Never fear; we’re working ahead so that there will be posts.  The tricky part will be putting a link on Doll Divas for our dollyfriends, but I’m sure I will be able to get it done from FL.

 

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Sniff, Sniff

No we don’t have colds, nor are we crying over spilt milk, but if we were, we would be all set.  After the popularity of our last hanky giveaway, we decided to do a hanky post, as we are both into hankies, and can’t pass a pile of them without a look-see to check if we need anything.  I once went to a sale where there were oodles of handkerchiefs.  There were several of us looking through them and purchasing them.  The lady at the sale said, “Oh, these are so old fashioned, guess no one uses them anymore”, and then three of us whipped hankies out of our pockets!  They are softer than tissues, and if you accidentally run one through the wash still in a pocket, there is no linty aftermath to clean up!

I was going to do a quick history of the hanky, but this wonderful website does a better job than anything I could come up with:

http://handkerchiefheroes.com/home/

After you read our post, be sure and take some time to tour her collection, as it is pretty darned amazing.

So without ado, here are some of our favorites.

Probably some of the nicest ones to use are the sweet handmade ones with fancy edgings.  Lots of soft cloth for your nose, but pretty and dainty anyway.  Edgings can be tatted, crochet, knotted and knitted.  I have a soft spot for the color-changing thread ones.  The yellow and brown one is supposed to be a butterfly, but the crafter might have done better adding some antennae:

Colorful Edgings    Fancy edgings

 

White work hankies abound.  Tons of white on white work.  Some of these are hand done, and some are commercial.  These are at least bleach-able when you use them!

Whitework

While we are doing whites, we come to the wedding hankies, or as I like to call them, “wave from the window hankies”.  Perfect for waving as the train pulls out, or to dab a widow’s tear in the court room.  I had one of these once that was literally one square inch of silk surrounded by a four inch lace border.  It was pretty amazing.

Lacy Hankies

 

Wave or Wedding

 

Not all lace is white; here is a lovely pink one:

Lacy Hankies2

As pretty as these are, we do tend to be more drawn to the graphic ones.  They make you smile!

Deb has a couple of dogs (of course!):

Dog Hankies

 

For some reason, cats are harder to find. They show up on tea towels more, so none to share from my collection, but I do have some wild animals in this one:

Glorious GraphicsNotice the native dancers around the edge, and I am not sure where they are living that you find moose and tiger skins, but whatever.  The rose one has some fun ’60s graphics as well.  Both of these are signed, and many designers did wonderful hankies around this time.

Other graphics include many holiday hankies.  A handkerchief was an acceptable gift when many other things were not, so Valentine’s examples abound, as well as the Christmas ones that were ubiquitous under the tree:

Holiday Hankies

 

Some hankies have fun shaped edges.  I love these, but ironing them is a pain:

Fancy Shapes

 

There are souvenirs of both places and events, although who would want to remember Wyoming is beyond me, plus your hanky would just blow away up there.  Guess it would be easier to catch than a Kleenex:

Remember Wyoming

 

Here is Deb’s wonderful wartime memento.  It’s very fragile after all these years:

Wartime Souvenir Hankie

I think Sister must have cherished it for many a year before Deb got it at an estate sale.

As well as humorous ones of all kinds:

Child's

1950s Calorie Hankie

It’s pretty sad, when you can’t blow your nose without dieting!

 

There are also some pretty spectacular embroidered pieces:

Embroidery on a grand scaleThese are both fairly large hankies.  I kept the W, as I turned it over and called it an M and it worked for me!  Many handkerchiefs had lots of handwork, but many were also commercially made.  I found this entire stack of samples at a sale a few years back:

Sample PakYou can see many of them look handmade, but who knew?  There are even some pretty convincing white work ones:

Closeup samplesI apologize for the foxing on these, but I didn’t want to wash them and risk removing the numbers, as this is not something you see often.

 

Deb also included a couple of interesting hanky accessories.  Every girl had to have a place to keep her supply.  There are lots of variations on these hanky books:

Hankie Storage BookMany of them came in this pink satin.  It must have been very popular at the time.  The pouch just folds open to place your hankies inside and then ties shut.  If the soft route is not for you, here is a hanky box:

Hankie BoxWell, guess it’s pink too!  This was definitely Deb’s as she loves silhouettes.

 

Please don’t forget to tour the hanky site, and for those of you that have stuck with us through all this, here is our giveaway:

Give away HankieJust leave a comment here or on Facebook to be entered, and you can sniff right along with us!  We’ll draw the winner on lucky Friday the 13th sometime in the evening.

Posted in Giveaways, Holidays, True Confessions, Weird Collections | Tagged , , | 14 Comments

Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, Something Blue

No, this isn’t a wedding post, although we are swathed in crystalline white here in monochromatic Colorado.  I was just looking through the pictures and that phrase popped into my head.  I do have to admit that borrowed is sort of a reach, though to be fair, all the bad things we take pictures of are on borrowed time.

The somethings old were mostly adorable:

Child's bowl     Child's bowl2

This child’s bowl had the cutest elephants all around the edges doing sporty kinds of things.  I’m not sure why they went with little girls making up doll beds for the central picture.  Sigh, boys had all the fun way back then!  It was well-loved and used; the interior picture was hard to see in person, never mind the glare and poor photography.  Plus, they had $13 on it, and you know what cheapskates we are!

This little bowl broke our hearts:

Bunny Child's plate  Bunny bowl mark

Again, very well-loved and used; sadly the cracks went all the way through.  The bunnies are so appealing and it’s Roseville to boot–probably from the 1920s.  They had the same price on this, and so we left it for someone else who would cherish this charming little bowl.  I know it’s hard for you to believe, but we don’t buy everything we see, just most of it!

Finally, something cute from that decade from hell–the ’70s:

Cute Rooster plate   Rooster plate mark

There are older versions of this pattern from Metlox, a California pottery, and they are even cuter!  If there were more pieces of this, I would have been mightily tempted to buy it and sell it on Etsy.

We have a couple of vintage crafts that we found–one good and one bad.  Guess which one this is:

TP hat

Rarely, does anything good come from a roll of toilet paper combined with plastic doilies, crochet, and fake flowers.  The worst part of all is that you couldn’t pull the t.p. out for use in emergencies!  This is purely, cough, decorative.

On the other hand, this is decorative and theoretically useful:

Crochet apron with rose

I don’t remember ever seeing a crocheted apron with a crocheted rose attached.  This little honey is in desperate need of starch to make it hang correctly.

These somethings new could qualify as somethings really, really old:

The Shelf that Time Forgot   The Shelf that Time Forgot

I’m not sure what market these dinosaurs are aimed at.  They aren’t cartoonish, but few adults want realistic resin dino tchotchkes on their shelves.  As far as kids are concerned, plastic or cloth dinosaurs are more fun to play with and won’t break–so what the heck?  The weirdest part is that they were gone next week.  Maybe a teacher bought them for a fun class display??

My take on this is going to surprise you:

Bottles with possiblities

Yeah, most of this is disgusting junk, but the two things with the orange arrows have definite possibilities, if I were the type to buy food at a thrift store.  The bottle on the far left end is oil with chili peppers and herbs.  This was probably a good thing at one time; too bad the recipient wasn’t open to trying it.  The bottle next to it is filled with different kinds of peppercorns–attractive and useful!  I’m sad that it ended up at Goodwill.

This poor giraffe goes right into the wtf file:

Wooden GiraffeI’m sort of freaked by the short neck–poor thing will never get a mate.  But what is the deal with the onesie?  If you look closely, that’s real fabric on the poor wooden thing and that knocks the whole shebang right out of the sanity ballpark.

Yes, we have bad crafts that aren’t too terribly old:

Bless this Child   Yes, bless this child

Yes Lord, please bless this child; it needs all the help it can get with a chimpanzee for a father.  If they’re trying to go for the Amish look, then it’s a fail.  I think it would have worked better just to use brown yarn for the beard, as ghastly as that idea sounds.  We totally get why this is at the thrift store; the only way it’s leaving is via the trash can.

This is the best of the somethings new:

Bovine S & P

I’m not sure why they’re in a basket, they aren’t kittens for Pete’s sake!  I think they would better fit in a salt and pepper corral or paddock.  They are decorative–just look at the necklaces of pink flowers they’re wearing.  If I wanted salt and pepper shakers, I could do much worse than this pair.

On to somethings borrowed:

Pheasant in a bag

This poor bagged pheasant would be on borrowed time in either of our households.  Kathy’s Scrappy cat would rip it to pieces on sight, while my dog Koko would probably carry the pheasant around getting it all wet and yucky before eating it.  We find these feathered birds amusing, but rarely bring them home because we don’t need more housework, thank you very much!

These pictures are very much on borrowed time in my book:

Figurine pictures

They were actually made this way–this isn’t someone’s craft project gone terribly, terribly wrong.  We couldn’t let the ’70s totally off the hook, even for one post.  I can see this pair hanging over someone’s piano and there they remained, until the household was broken up.  The heirs, to their immense credit, weren’t totally oblivious to the hideousness of these two instrument-torturing imps.  I nearly dropped them, but with my luck they would have survived the “accident”.

You can’t get much bluer than these glass poodle bottles:

$7 Blue Poodel bottles2

They’re trying so hard to look old, but they aren’t.  I have no idea why Goodwill marked them $7 each; what the heck would you do with them?  I suppose they would look okay on your window sill (if no one looked too closely) with the sun shining through them.  I like poodle stuff and yet left them right there on the shelf.

Well, that used up most of our picture backlog.  We’ll be shopping and snapping photos tomorrow like usual.  Thanks for reading, and if you have an idea for a post, or pictures you want to share, send them our way.  We need all the help we can get!

 

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Unworthy for Regifting

Well, the majority of those gifting holidays have passed yet again, and we have noticed that some particularly heinous stuff has hit the thrift stores.  We figure the recipients took one look at it all, and decided it was too awful to even wrap up and present again.  Of course considering the age of some of these, they procrastinated quite a long time before driving through the drop-off lane at the local charity shop, but hey, they got it done, right?

Take this handy-dandy item:

Nut Sheller--Ideal GiftThey had to tell you both on the inside and the outside of the box, that it is the “ideal gift”.  I am not sure who they are trying to convince, themselves or the customer.  Actually, it looks like there isn’t a nut in the world that could stand up to those iron jaws, and if you were a squirrel, it just might make the perfect gift list, but for me, I am pretty sure jewelry would top it.  We did like the addendum that it is great for lobster claws.  Guess it could be an all-purpose accessory.  Think how much fun it would be to whip out at the local seafood joint.

We hope this next one was a gag gift:

Cowboy Bug KillerI am not sure why Cowboys are required to go through so much trouble to smash a bug.  I would just stomp on it with those big old cowboy boot heels.   Plus, if you had a bug of any size at all, say the odd scorpion or giant cockroach, what good is an itty-bitty hammer like that going to do you?  I say make with the sledgehammer, and get it over with.

We pity the new mom gifted with this next gem for the little one’s room:

BallooningHow in the world do you come up with something nice to say for that?  I don’t care how cute the bear in the basket was.  Of course, that is probably why the basket is empty and the giant lavender, flowered, balloon monstrosity is relegated to the thrift store aisles.  Take the stuffed bear and run, girl!  You could always claim the child threw up on the decoration making it unfit for display.  Yeah, let’s go with that one.

As we walked around, being the gardeners we are, we noticed a few too many slimy things:

A slither of slugsYeah, someone’s snail collection had slithered onto the shelves.  We kept picking them up and moving them to be together, figuring if you wanted one snail, surely you would want more, but we gave up after four.  Here is a situation where someone noticed Mildred had a glass snail.  Surely, she would want another, and another, and another.  Pretty sure that has happened to us all at one time or another.  Why do they never notice the lack of a #1 Barbie on my shelves and take care of that?

These lamps really stumped us:

They liked amber lamps apparentlyObviously, a pair, but how to explain the shades?  Then we looked closer and realized the taller shade was the original one (exact match to the pattern of the base) and the other was a replacement.  Not a huge mystery, EXCEPT, where in the world did they find another nasty gold shade?  Heck, I’ve had trouble finding a clear glass one for a lamp that has broken.  Who knew harvest gold would be that easy to replace?  Of course, the whole thing begs the question: “Why did they replace the gold shade?”  I think I could have been OK with just tossing both and calling it a day.

We actually liked this lamp:

ShipwreckedIt’s got that whole kitschy ’50s thing going on.  The masts had suffered a little bit of a maelstrom at sea and needed some tweaking, but it looked doable.  We weren’t sure what drunken sailor had done the rigging with what looked like a shoestring, but it too, looked fixable.  Neither of us could see putting this one into port at our homes, as our hubbies might have keelhauled us, but it was fun, and we hope someone took it home to love it.  We were kind of surprised that this one actually made it onto the shelves, as our local Goodwill has developed a whole wake of vultures (I had to look that one up!) who pounce on anything resale-worthy the minute it comes out of the back room.  We are often glad they aren’t too smart.

On the other hand, we know why this fabric was passed along:

Gak!We were lucky enough to see it from the wrong side first, as some kind stocker had folded it backwards, but being the gluttons for punishment that we are, we had to go and unfold it.  Sorry.  What could you possibly make out of this that wouldn’t have your fairy godmother rushing to your aid to help you out with your fashion sense?  It seems a bit too scary to even turn into rags, plus polished cotton doesn’t soak up much of anything except, apparently, bad taste.

I guess it does go pretty well with these:

When you need your wildflower letters to be visibleThese were 4″ tall for heaven’s sake.  What do you do with them?  I think they should say punch them out, throw them away!  Plus, wildflower casual?  Is that the hippie equivalent of dressing down?  The package was unopened, so I guess we will never know the answer.

OK, one last fun thing.  Deb and I both have a soft spot for paper beads:

Paper bead close upWe especially like old ones from the ’20s and ’30s, which these weren’t, but we still can admire the time and effort put into enough of these to make an entire purse!

Paper bead PurseI think it was only the funkiness of the handles that kept one or the other of us giving this a new home.   Well, that and the fact that we are to the point of having to sneak new purses into our respective homes.  Men just can’t understand why you need more than one.  They have had the same wallet for the last 1000 years (and it shows!).

That’s it for this week.  We have a big storm heading for Colorado this weekend, but we are going to brave the rain on Friday to shop, and then hole up for the weekend while it snows on us.  I would ask for pity, but all those folks back east might strangle us!

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What’s Love Got to Do with It?

How to explain all the bad Valentine’s Day presents we find abandoned at thrift stores?  Well, maybe Shakespeare can sum it all up for us, “Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind”.  Mental blindness or plain old procrastination coupled with panic probably drives 90% of these Valentine’s Day “oopsies”.

Boy, whoever gave this bear tried to cover all the bases:

The Bear Necessities   Bear Necessities2

Cute bear, check.  Hearts, check.  Plastic roses with hearts, check.  Unfortunately, none of that means anything unless that base is really the lid to a big jar filled with chocolate, jewelry, or some other splurge.  If the lid is really just a base, and that’s the Valentine’s Day present, well then, just don’t!  Save your $$, pay for a babysitter, take me to that chick flick I really want to see, and no whining!  Remember, there is an unofficial holiday (don’t click the link if you’re offended by sex jokes) exactly one month after Valentine’s Day, that will only come into play if you do good on February 14th.

What can we say about this lineup?

Probably won't sell at a thrift store eitherIf they’re a present for a kid on Valentine’s Day–yay, you can get them new for cheap!  If they’re for your sweetheart–fail!  We can’t speak for all women, but that has never stopped us from wondering how teddy bears became the go-to present for V.D.?  Honestly, I would rather have a raggedy bouquet of daisies than a stuffed bear with a heart!

But as bad as bears are, what do these next creatures have to do with love?

Valentine's Day Crabs

Crabs for Valentine’s Day would be a big no-no unless they’re also called: Blue, Stone, Rock, Alaskan King, Dungeness and also known as “dinner”.

This also brings up the Valentine’s Day dogs,

Stuff Dog Valentines  Killer Valentine

or cats, if we had a picture.  These are marginally better than crabs, but again what if she isn’t a stuffed animal kind of person?  You’re stuck with this goofy thing, and even worse, if you don’t say anything, guess what you’re going to get next year?  OMG, it’s a lose-lose scenario unless you can calmly state your case for NO MORE STUFFED ANIMALS!  Lucky is the person who likes stuffed animals; they can’t lose come Valentine’s Day.

We both think these guys are even worse than crabs, bears, or pets:

Serial Apist

All I can think of when I see these lover-boy apes is Serial Ape-ist, which is a low-budget horror flick that the character, Penny from The Big Bang Theory, stars in.  You can see this poor gorilla isn’t any more thrilled than we are to be co-opted into Valentine’s Day.  I just looked at his boxers, and if they’re covered in chili peppers, shouldn’t the waistband say, “HOT THING”?

So, after all the complaining, what do we recommend as a Valentine’s Day present?  Well, that’s where your knowledge of your honey comes in.  People like thoughtful presents and that kind of inspiration doesn’t happen when you’re running through the gas station or Target at 5pm on February 14th.  Figure out what they like and give it to them if you can–that says I Love You more than a whole shelf full of stuffed animals.  Or, you can go this route:

Tru Dat!

Tru Dat!!!!!

Happy Valentine’s Day to you all–wish we could give everyone a hug.  That’s a one-size fits all kind of present!

Cat and Dog Valentine

 

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