Winter Blues

That stupid rodent in PA has a lot to answer for. I got up on Tuesday of this week and my thermometer informed me it was -14°, and that is Fahrenheit, not some wimpy Celsius scale. I seriously debated about staying in bed for six more weeks, but work called. I have to say I was NOT happy about it though. It might not be so bad, but we have had snow on the ground for weeks and weeks as well. I take my life and limb in hand every time I venture out of the house. One of these days I am going to fall in a spectacular heap. The only bright spot in my house is this:

I can’t seem to grow any other type of citrus, but my kumquats do pretty well every year. We have enough to have a couple of extra-tasty margaritas, and the tree looks pretty good. It’s a good thing they ripen midyear, as that’s about the time I need to apply the systemic again to keep the spider mites off. I have no idea how a plant can go without bugs for six months, and then magically develop them again.

One, singular sensation:

Ok, so maybe not A Chorus Line, but a gazelle line? A limbo line? An ugly beyond belief line? Seriously, did the person in charge of making these (and they were hand done ceramics) truly believe that they were so attractive that they needed to make more of them? If they were hauled to a craft show, the maker got a really rude awakening. They should have been tossed back into the packing bin they came in, and hopefully most of them got broken on the way in. The really scary part was the next week, we only saw one of these left. It’s way after Christmas and surely there is no such thing as Valentine’s White Elephant Exchange is there?

All we could think if was “ouch”:

Just where were they going with this? Wherever it was it, seems a sort of sadistic kind of place. You are meant to use the handle and nothing else in fear for your life. I am surprised they didn’t succumb to putting thorns under the pitcher spout, but they obviously didn’t have much faith in the pouring ability of this shape, although, it really doesn’t look that bad. All in all, it is not attractive, useful, or necessary—a triple threat! It needs a cat to take a casual swipe at it and knock it off the shelf.

We are giving this one points for being Eco Friendly:

It was made out of all sorts of plastic bags! There was some visible writing on some of them, so we know they are recycled. It was a pretty ambitious project, and while we applaud the idea, the execution leaves something to be desired. They could have stopped with just one flower, and been fine, and what is up with the wad of green plastic at the top? We supposed it was to pad the handles, but I think suffering for the sake of beauty would have been better, or maybe go back to more of the yellow? It puts you in mind of some sort of moldy growth on the handle, and that is not good. Colorado has enacted a plastic bag ban, you now have to pay 10 cents a piece for a paper bag, or bring your own from home. Just think, these will go the way of the dodo very soon. Better grab one now, or maybe not.

At the risk of being cliché, we present this:

Bless those hard drinkin’ and smokin’ folks from the Ozarks cause that is all they are known for. Must be a moonshine still in every back yard, except for the ones with a kiln to churn out these. I don’t even think we can blame China for this one. To top it off the crazy nuts at the thrift store thought it was worth $5.99. Cause ugly ash trays are in such high demand. Even as a vintage Etsy seller, I avoid all but the most outrageous collectible ash trays, as no one wants them these days. Thank goodness. No hostess with the mostess need ever have this on her coffee table again.

On the other hand, the blame for most all of this lies directly within China’s borders:

The thing is, we were actually so fixated on the red and white button girl over on the left, we almost missed the entire parade of crap beside her! Fake Hummels, fake Precious Moments, fake taste, fake sense of style, it has it all. (There may be a real Precious Moments figurine in there, but do we care?) I am as guilty as the next person of harboring some useless junk on my shelves, but there is not a single thing here that is even the slightest bit tempting. Surely it came out of one little old lady’s china cupboard. We are going to insist that they were all gifts from misguided young grandchildren and give her a break!

Just so you get a good closeup of button girl, here she is:

Someone worked pretty hard to make something this sickly sweet thing. Again, not worth the dusting. Rip her apart and plop those buttons on a sweater, and maybe you would have something. She is a bit childish for an adult, and a bit silly for a child, so she has no niche in the gift giving hierarchy, and should just be ditched in favor of a gift card. If you knew how much I hated getting gift cards or cash, you would know how much I hate this lady!

Well, things are looking up from here on out. Here is another pretty china pattern:

We thought it was lovely and quite subtle with the silvery gray and pale brown maple leaves and seeds. It was marked Royal Albert, so a better than average maker that shows in the lovely design and dainty decals. A whole table of this on a dusty rose tablecloth would be amazing wouldn’t it? Luckily there were only a couple of pieces marked at $4.99 each, so there it stayed.

This last item is another Junk Jaunt treasure. I am finally getting around to photographing these things, just because I really want to find my desk under the clutter, so I can fill it up with more clutter, but at least I am making the attempt. I am a sucker for early interior decorating and architecture paper ephemera, and this one has the added advantage of being in full color. The fashions, the décor, the colors, the whole nine yards, tell you the era it belongs to. I love the colors and some of the names are just as fun. It is a very interesting snapshot of a time, and sometimes we forget just how bright some of those old color palettes were.

Love this first picture. I am pretty sure all paint dries while you wait!

And a couple of shots of the inside. Love the splatter colors best, and don’t you love that Chinese red is orange?

Here’s hoping a certain groundhog was soooo wrong about the weather, if not, anyone up for gopher soup?