Crazy And Not So Crazy Craft Patterns XVI

We are having our typical Colorado spring weather around here. A little rain, a lot of wind, but just enough warm weather to make folks run out to the garden and work in the yard. We will all pay for it in a bit, when we get our last few spring snows, but look under optimist in the dictionary, and you see a picture of a high plains gardener! With Deb at her mom’s, I had to shop alone last week, and for some reason I just don’t see as much crazy stuff without my sounding board, so I decided to delve into the stack of craft patterns I have been saving to share with you all. Today, we will hit up some fashion ones, but do stay till the end, as I have a great pattern to share.

I found an old notebook in my stash, that had obviously been a Home Ec project as it was full of all those little sample sewing pieces we all did. Make a seam, pink a seam, clip a seam, make a hem, etc. In the back they had gathered a whole bunch of articles and brochures on sewing, and there were some fun ones.

These first two were on the serious side, but I did like this one:

The front was plain, and there were only two pages inside, but what I loved here were the names of the styles of swimsuits in the upper right corner. Who knew there was a Mio? The sizing is pretty scary as well. I know I used to be a 16 and am now down to a 10. What a diet, or a marketing ploy! Lose sizes without losing a single pound.

What I probably need is this:

This one was titled Undergarments for Teens. Can you see telling a teen these days she needs a girdle? I am glad I hit my teens after all this, as just the instructions on how to put one on scare me. If you can’t guess, these were put out by J.C. Penney. Notice the not so subtle feature of the label. No dates unfortunately.

These next three were from some sort of magazine and were entitled 3-Minute Sewing Lessons. There was a picture on one side and some text on the other with some helpful hints for harder-to-sew things. Take this first one about leather:

Pretty clever ideas, and some good advice. I think these are pretty cute accessories. Betting they date to the ’70s what with all that red white and blue.

Here is another in the same series:

For the life of me, I can’t remember who thought it would be a good idea to wear a poncho as a skirt, but wear them we did. Can you just see this as a Barbie outfit? Me too. Honestly, I’ve seen worse, and a purse with fringe was always my be-all and end-all. I never got one though. Poor me.

Speaking of Barbie, I am sure that Ken had an outfit just like this:

Poor guy, but he is putting a brave face on it. I am also worried about that thing around her neck. I think it brings new meaning to the phrase “Old ball and chain”. Not the most practical, nor the most beautiful of necklaces.

This next fashion pamphlet deserves more that one picture. RIT dye has a lot to answer for:

I am sure these were not in the movie, but hey, they are still red white and blue, and as far as tie dye goes kind of cool. After the cover, things go down hill:

Someone needs to explain this whole photo shoot to me. What motivation can they possibly give for that gal in the purple? Paint Your Wagon and let me kick your a**? The gal in the brown looks sad about it, and the one in blue apparently lost a contact lens, or she forgot what her shoes look like.

I always love it when they make the fellas get in on the act:

She’s afraid he is going to make a run for it, and he is just grinning and bearing it for all he is worth. The booklet dates to 1969, so straddles the craziness of both the ’60s and ’70s.

While we are looking at crazy, check this out:

I am a fringe girl, but even I would not be caught dead in that sheepdog-looking thing. The striped one might be OK, but who knows what colors it was. Probably, avocado green and purple. Just in case you feel the need to make these. I am including the instructions, as they should be preserved for posterity, so folks can see the collective insanity, and they may even be back in style sometime in the next year, as bell bottoms are coming back:

You know a post like this would be incomplete without making fun of a little crochet. Plus, if I hurry up and use these, I can toss them in the donation pile with nary a care. (These came in a whole pile of freebies, lest you think I spent good money on them.) You know we can’t resist poking fun at afghans, well here is all the zaniness in a small size:

You know some enterprising person decided these would make great scrap craft projects, and they came out in every conceivable bad color combination on the planet. These wouldn’t even make very good placemats, as you know that would be the tippiest spot ever for your wine glass. On the bright side if you make sure it is red wine, your problems could be solved in one easy splash.

These, at least tell what you really should do:

Stop, wrong way, don’t go there, whatever Linde and Flint mean, just say no to traffic pillows. [Deb here. I have to confess that I was born in Flint MI and spent two years living there. Linde, might be a misspelling of Linden MI, which isn’t too far from Flint.] Where do you put them? In the garage? No self-respecting man cave is going to let these through the door, so there is no earthly place they would be useful. Even the police will give these a pass at their fundraising auction.

I thought this last idea was pretty cute. If I had a tiny place and needed a sewing spot, I might be tempted:

It’s bright and cheery, and rather clever. Here are the instructions for that too:

Last up, an extra bonus. Found this while looking through another vintage crafting magazine. I always snag the sewing stuff from the ’60s as there are frequently doll patterns. This magazine dated to 1969, so it was well after the movie. I did some digging and this is the closest I could find to the dress in the movie:

Here is their take on it:

I am sure they were going for Deborah Kerr, as they specify a doll with red hair for it. I am including the instructions and patterns for it. I have not tried this pattern, so there is no saying how good it is. I might give it a whirl later on as the chance to make a hoop skirt could be fun.

Sorry, I couldn’t get the skirt all on one page! Imagine how big it is going to be!!! Here are some quick measurements to make sure it prints right. The shoulder ruffle is 3 inches long. The top edge of the overskirt is 4 inches long, and the skirt has an inch marking on it.

Now all together sing, “Shall we dance? dum, dum dum, shall we dance? Or shall we craft?”