At The Top Of The Slope

We hope all our loyal readers had a fabulous Thanksgiving filled with good food, family, and friends. I saw a cute sign the other day. It said “Leftovers are for Quitters”. I thought it was funny, but for me, the leftovers are the best part. All the yummy food, none of the cooking and if you get really lazy, you can eat it off paper plates. You don’t even have to wash the good china. If all I have to carefully wash is a wine glass, that is my idea of the perfect meal.

Of course, now that Thanksgiving is over, that means it is all Christmas all the time now. No escaping Santa. Start your countdown and see how long you can go before you get Whammed. I personally don’t last much past the first week. To give you all a break, today’s post is non-Christmas themed. All bets will be off later in the month.

I think I will start with the worst, and just get it out of the way. Then you can sit back and relax, knowing that you have already seen this:

You should be thrilled that there is some plastic between you and this porker, which does obscure some of it. It’s still bad, but hopefully your eyes will not burn too much. We know it’s a pig in an ugly hat, but that is about all we can say about this pin. There is no signature, so at least someone had the integrity to hide their identity after making it. Gotta be some low-level import trash place. Who would have purchased this in the first place? I can think of no situation that would call for a pin this ugly. Let’s have a pig roast, maybe it will melt.

On the other hand, this made us laugh:

It would be perfect for that pool party chip and dip. The blood dribbling out the side of the shark mouth is a nice touch, if you are into Jaws. We did, however, have some usage questions. I don’t know how easy it would be to dip your chip without scraping your hand on the teeth, but I suppose that is part of the adventure? It would prevent the dreaded double dip. Also, it would have to be a fairly small party, as there is just not nearly enough room for chips. Another disadvantage is long-term storage. Better hope you have a pool house with a large cupboard.

This should be put back in the cupboard. A very deep dark cupboard, preferably with lots of holes in it, so it can fall into the back and never be seen again:

Ok, maybe it’s not that bad, but it’s not great either. Plastic canvas has a lot to answer for. I don’t what the folks who invented it were thinking, but surely there was some beer and a few bets involved? “Hey Frank, bet I can sell an uglier idea than you.” Frank promptly accepted the challenge and came up with the pig pin.

We want to know all about this:

Apparently, Emma was not great at hair dye, but for the rest of the deal she was solid except for maybe that attendance. Really? Only 78%? No wonder she failed hair dye. Bet all those courses were a real eye opener in 1937. The mind boggles at Cosmetic Chemistry. What was she mixing up? We always feel bad that no one can make a little space for something like this from Grandma. Take it out of the frame and put it in a scrap book at least.

Who needs some lettuce glasses?

No really, who needs ’em? Apparently, no one, as here they are. What was the design idea here? I always serve my beverages in a cabbage head. They were a particularly nasty shade of celery green as well. Just imagine them with something vaguely red in them. They would turn a perfectly horrendous shade of brown. Lucky for the new buyer there is a whole set of six of them, so you would be in luck. I would plop these puppies in the dishwasher and hope they all broke.

We have another entry into our bad souvenir category:

Why the airport? I have never heard a traveler say, gee, I just took this fantastic trip and airport was the best part. Did they touch down at Heathrow and never make it off the concourse? If so, buy a map and call it good. Better yet, hit the duty-free shop and buy some alcohol. It would make the airport better. Oh wait, maybe they did and the shop got them on the way out the door with this.

Last up, a couple of entries from the giant starving artist couch painting category. First up, the jungle cat:

Can it scream ’70s any louder? That orange would have been perfect with your avocado green carpet and harvest gold sofa. I have to say, I sort of like this style of painting. If it had been smaller and a real painting, it would have been a slam dunk. Of course a new frame would be absolutely necessary.

This next one is pretty fantastic too:

Well isn’t he just the cock of the walk. I bet every other chicken in the barnyard is jealous. The hens probably follow that tail around sighing with longing. He probably drives a Porche too. If you don’t get that last reference, just think of what he might be over compensating for. I am not even going to apologize to those car owners, because I have seen too many midlife crisis vehicles in my day. All that being said, we had to admit that we succumbed to the tail too. We thought it was pretty cool. No, we did not bring it home.

Strap on your helmets and get ready for the ride to The Holiday. We will be around to keep you amused. We have some Christmas Craft things coming up, and who know what else we will find?

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2 Responses to At The Top Of The Slope

  1. OMG, that pig is the worst thing…why????Why in the world anyone would want a pig in a rain hat…LOL. Too funny!

    • kathy & deb says:

      We don’t understand, either! Even if you liked pigs and thought they were cute, you would have to admit this one isn’t anything but ugly. It’s a mystery!! Hugs Sandi.

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