The Winter Blues

Well, I am just feeling generally crabby today, so who knows what you are going to get.  It’s been sort of cloudy and windy for the last few days.  That sets off my allergies, and even though it is a bit warmer, and it hasn’t snowed for over a month, my street is still an ice skating rink.  To get to the mailbox, you have to put on cleats, and strap two pillows to your butt, in case you fall, and then the mail is just full of bills from Christmas.  What’s up with that?  The only bright spot in the whole thing are the seed catalogs that come fairly often.  I am pretty sure that means spring is right around the corner, or at least we can pretend.

Estate sales have been few and far between during the holidays. They are starting up again, but for now, we have some leftover finds to share.  Let’s start off easy with a bunch of grapes:

We went to a sale years ago that had dozens of these in all sizes and colors, and now we can’t walk by one without it intruding on our consciousness.  This one was very different with slightly shimmery grapes in various colors.  If I saw real grapes like this, I would be suspicious about eating them, but hey, if it matches your peach bathroom, go for it.  Though why they should be hanging out in the bathroom is beyond me.  Guess they didn’t match the kitchen.

Speaking of things that catch our eyes.  We once read a book with a story about someone who collected Last Supper items.  How lucky are they that we don’t know their address?

This was hanging out in the Christmas stuff on clearance, and while it is religious, I think they have their holidays mixed up.  And no matter what holiday you are going for, the only real solution to this is a hammer.  What would Leonardo think of this utterly hideous rendering of his famous subject?  I am pretty sure there is no artist on earth who has a sense of humor that well developed.  I just heard through the grapevine that they are opening one of those places you can pay to go and smash things in our town.  Wonder if they would let us make suggestions?  Of course we would go broke wanting to be the first to smash so many things.  [Deb here.  B.H. just announced that there are only 11 Apostles with Jesus.  So, it’s hideous and WRONG!]

This cracked us up:

Yes, it is a couple of cheap little tie ons for Christmas packages, and yes it is marked $49.00.  Bit optimistic don’t you think?  We often accuse the stores of pricing things for their half off days, but this might be taking it a bit too far.  We did take it up front for the clerks to get a laugh, and they did.  Bet it made the rounds of the back room too.  Gotta laugh, or you spend your life crying.

I think a call to the Child Labor Board is in order:

What are the Elks doing, setting up a sweatshop?  And really, if you must force children to make pottery for your Fraternal Order, couldn’t you invest some sort of colored glaze, or a flower decal or two?  And to top it off, an ashtray?  Pushing smoking, poor pottery skills, and somewhere behind it all they were probably pouring whiskey into shot glasses for the tiny tots, to keep them in line.  I would like to think the Elks do better work than that, but a quick Google search didn’t reveal a whole lot of use for them.  Apologies to the Elks in the world, feel free to set me straight, but you’d better search these out and destroy them first.

While the dishes are in the air, so to speak, at least we hope they are, the better to smash them, take a gander at this:

My goodness it has one of everything.  The design was gilded and raised in places, too, but the whole thing just looked off, and lo and behold, it was:

So besides being ugly, it could kill you, and no one even had to throw it at you to accomplish it.  There is no excuse for new, ugly, poisonous dishes.

On the other hand, it breaks our hearts that things like this go unpurchased:

No one will buy this lovely coffee set and take it home these days, and we just can’t rescue them all, but how pretty is this?  I think we should spend more of our time drinking out of things like this again.  Perhaps we all need to slow down, pour a cup of coffee (and I don’t mean get a paper cup full of sugar from Starbucks) or tea and just enjoy a pretty cup, some blue sky, and the light trill of a bird singing.  Oh wait, there is that spring fever creeping in again.  Enjoy what ever you like, but have a pretty cup while you do it!

OK, enough sappiness, on to silly.  Check out this pattern:

And if the front doesn’t get you then the back will:

If you get a chance, zoom in and see just what you can make with this pattern.  I particularly like the White Witchery Vest and the Mad Money Bag.  Someone was working overtime on too much caffeine to come up with those descriptions.  Maybe it was the gals on the front, as the one on the back already looks a little possessed.  Perhaps she is just overwhelmed at the damage she will be doing to her future child when she dresses them in that itchy sweater and bonnet.

Lastly, we come to a whatsis.  Taking any and all guesses:

This was well over four feet long, and there was a sort of loopy thing at one end:

And that funny tail at the other.  It was hollow.  I suggested it was for your pet snake, when he wants to stretch out.  Other than that, we are at a loss. Feel free to chime in, the goofier the better, you know us.

Well, that might have gotten a few bits of snarkiness out of my system.  Good enough to set off on a new adventure.  There is an estate sale today that might have our name on it, and hey, if it isn’t great, I bet there will be at least one funny thing there, so next week, you will be in luck!

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4 Responses to The Winter Blues

  1. Stephanie Gazell says:

    OMG, that was hilarious! ” There is no excuse for new, ugly, poisonous dishes.” Made me laugh out loud at my desk, and my boss is probably wondering why. That tea set is lovely and I so want that pretty creamer with the blue inside! The leather thing….I vote for something to keep elephants in line – I can picture a “keeper” touching their sides with it, while heading to the pool to have a dip. Suddenly, Tarzan is there…and….oh wait, I’m daydreaming again. *sigh* Fun post, gals! Have a good weekend!

    • kathy & deb says:

      Hey Stephanie, you’re the second person to suggest using the whatsis on animals, so if it isn’t strictly ornamental(?) than there is probably merit in your idea. So glad that you were laughing at work–your boss should be happy about that! Hope you have a fun weekend, too.

  2. Emily C says:

    is the last item a crop? for making your horse go faster.

    • kathy & deb says:

      Well, it sure would scare your horse into going faster! It’s about 4.5 feet long, with only the woven loop to swing it by, so it would be awkward to use. However, yours is the only sensible suggestion so far so thank you for thinking out of the box and passing along your idea!!

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