Love is a Battlefield

I’ve always wondered how and when Valentine’s Day started.  Apparently, it was a Roman holiday, Lupercalia, a celebration of spring and fertility, which was appropriated by a pope in the 5th century.  (We can’t have those pagan fertility rituals being celebrated!)  There were several martyred men by the name of Valentine, so there is some question of which one was celebrated on this day.  Somehow, around the 14th century, it started being associated with romantic love.  According to legend, one of the Valentines wrote a letter to his jailer’s daughter and signed it, “your Valentine”.  The real reason is probably lost in the mists of time, but still, this is a very old holiday!

Traditionally, the usual gifts were candy and flowers and maybe a nice card which were first printed during the 1700s.  If that tradition were followed today, we wouldn’t have a thing to write about on February 14th!

When I see stuff like this in a thrift store, I’m thankful, but sad.  It’s good that the owners see the errors of their ways, but it feels like we’re howling in the wildness.  I guess we aren’t influencers:

I wish I had a rolled-up newspaper to swat the nose of whomever manufactured these and the store buyer who bought them.  As a small aside, I would NEVER swat my dog on the nose, just so you know.  But, the instigator of this group deserves some punishment.  We can’t be sure what they say or sing because none of them worked—yay!  But you know it’s something godawful.  I’m extremely worried about what the ape in the yellow raincoat is up to; the best scenario would be him singing, “It’s Raining Men”.  When I was at ARC this week, all of these were gone, except the ape in the raincoat.  I hope they were bought for kids, and not sweethearts.

However, these miscreants were still on the shelves waiting to trick the desperate or unwary:


It made me want to cry, “No, no, no, have we taught you nothing??!!”  It’s hard to say which is worse—the flower or the caped heart.  Each is horrible in its own special way, and neither conveys the message, “You’re special”—it’s more like, “I’m an idiot!”  Personally, if you HAVE to get me a stuffed animal, I’ll take the stegosaurus next to the heart.

I can’t believe this is still around:

Do you think it was used as a classroom decoration for Valentine’s Day?  My guess is that someone made if for a little girl’s bedroom in the 1980s or ’90s.  It is pretty horrible, but once again, it was gone this week.  What are people thinking?  If you need to decorate, why not use this garland:

It’s kind of hard to see, but those shapes are Xs and Os in various shades of pink.  I thought it was a fun garland, and this was the reason I swung by ARC this week.  I wanted to buy it on Senior Day when most things are half off for those of us over 55 years old.  Even the Micky and Minnie sticker set next to it on the end cap would have been a fun way to decorate for smaller kids.  Or, you could give the stickers away as Valentines.

We have seen these stuffed dolls before:

It would be super weird to get one from your S.O., but maybe your sympathetic sister or girlfriend could give it to you.  I’m not sure what’s so romantic about him inviting your parents over for dinner; that’s sort of the anti-romantic in my book.  But, I would never complain about breakfast, or even a cup of coffee in bed.  Sadly, this little cloth man could say the words, but never follow through.  The most useful thing about him is the two AA batteries included in the box.  You could use them in your remote … or something.

This made us laugh:

If you don’t get your handsome prince, at least you will have a foot tall squishy frog.  Somehow, I think the frog might be less trouble.  Do you remember Prince Charming from the movie/musical Into the Woods?  Prince “I was raised to be charming, not sincere”?Give me the frog any day!

Okay, we did see some fun, nice things:

You could use this as a vase and put one rose in it—so nice.  If you wanted to use it as a glass, then fill it with chocolates.  Hey presto, gift giving problem solved pretty darn cheaply.

Or, how about this matched pair:

Well, don’t get me started on the word, Bae, but the sentiment is good.  Plus, cups are pretty essential when you’re serving breakfast in bed for two, which would be a wonderful way to start the day.  Or, if you’re not a morning person, hot cocoa in the evening while listening to music or watching your favorite chick flick.  So much better than most of the things in this post.

Stephanie G. please contact us with your email address and we will send along the patterns for those mid-century modern pillows on the leaflet cover from last week’s craft post.

Hope you all have a wonderful Valentine’s Day, and are showered with love, flowers, and chocolates.


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2 Responses to Love is a Battlefield

  1. OSS says:

    I won’t get you started on the BAE rant as I have NO idea what it stands for. It’s one of those “new” things that I see and mean to Google, but I never do because I have more pressing things to look up like “why is there never any milk in the fridge when I want some to go with my cookie?” or “Hey! Who ate the last cookie???” Hope you ladies get something GOOD for Valentine’s Day! – Dawn

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