Summer in Full Swing

Why does Mother Nature feel that we need to go from 65° and rainy to 95°  and sunny in the space of a week?  Oh well, just one of those Colorado things.  I do get the teeniest bit cranky at 95°, as our house is not equipped with AC.  I just try for a cool drink and hope for a breeze on the patio.  But … one thing summer does give us is full-on garage sale season.  There must have been a dozen neighborhood sales last weekend, and almost that many again this weekend.  We have a habit of skipping the big sales and heading out to all the poor schmucks who didn’t realize that this was NOT the weekend for a sale.  We do pretty well with that, and they are grateful for any business that comes their way.  I know this for a fact, as we made this mistake a few years ago when having a sale.

Of course, just because they have no people, does not mean they are full of winners.  Check this out:

2016-06-09-09.00.57.jpg.jpg

Nobody can love violins that much, can they?  And now that you have a crocheted violin what are you supposed to do with?  It’s not playable; of course for some beginning players this could be a distinct advantage.  It’s certainly not decorative, no matter how you look at it.  I guess you just sell it at a garage sale.  At this same sale was a whopper of a crocheted turkey too, but you will just have to wait for Thanksgiving for that one.

Surprisingly, this was NOT at the above sale:

Granny used all the scrap yarn on this throwThat’s a whole lot of colors for the same afghan.  I am all for stash busting, but there has got to be a better way.  We are sincerely hoping that no one has a room that this would just be perfect for.  Unless it is a windowless cube with no lights, and then you might be forgiven.  Maybe just close up the flaps on that box and leave it that way … permanently.

I have decided that Deb just might be slipping.  We have been tracking the progress of this bizarre poodle for a few weeks:

Gray Pottery Poodle2We couldn’t decide if it had an ultra poodle cut, or maybe it had cacti for legs.  From the front you can see just how chunky those thighs are:

Gray Pottery PoodleIt definitely won’t fall over.  It has a nice wide base, and some vaguely jaunty flowers on its body.  They had it priced at some sort of ridiculous amount, so we took the photos and moved on.  It has now been several weeks of the poodle moving around to various spots on the shelves, but never leaving due to the overpricing.  This week it was half price, and Deb was beginning to feel sorry for it.  I took her temperature immediately.  Upon closer examination, we noticed it actually had one leg that had been broken and glued back, well, but still broken, and even at half price, a bit nutty.  She recovered and left it on the shelf.

This next item falls under the “why” category:

Battenburg Frog with Rhinestone EyeWe were OK, but maybe not thrilled, with the lace amphibian, it might be OK framed, but why gild the lily with the rhinestone eye?  When you put the whole thing together it’s just one big question mark.  Like, why buy it?  Why hang it?  Hang it where?  The list might be endless.

While we were “pond”ering the frog, we came upon his friend the duck:

Nail DuckMore questions.  Did they really have that many extra nails just lying around?  No chicken coop that needed building, or siding requiring mending that might put them to better use?  [Deb here: my theory is that when your only art supply is a hammer, all of your projects look like nails].  Is that duck smiling; and if so, what about?  Looks evil to me.  Plus the whole thing seemed like a lot of extra work just to do a piddly little amount of string art.  I think it needs tossed on the rubbish heap to rust in peace.

At least these made us smile:

You kids stop rough housing in there!I don’t know if they heard a really good joke, or maybe the grass has finally turned green and they are taking advantage of it to have a good long roll.  But, no matter the reason they look like they are having a rollicking good time.  I might have brought these home, given my fondness for bunnies, but there is no way I am dragging any of that cheap resin junk into my home.  I am trying to train them NOT to make it.

We also thought these were pretty:

Despite appearances, made in ChinaNot useful, of course, but kind of pretty in a decorative boudoir sort of way.  Imagine our surprise to find they were made in China.  Better than average, for there.  I find the dainty Irish Belleek versions of these impossible to resist.  Luckily most of them are broken in myriad places before they hit the garage sale/thrift store arena, so I only own one of them.

This was also a “good thing” (to quote Ms. Martha Stewart):

Hand VaseI don’t know why we find these hand things amusing, but we do.  I particularly liked the tiny little rose ring on this one.  I don’t remember which company manufactured this, but one of the nice Japan companies that made fun things in the ’50s and ’60s.  We managed to avoid this one too, as it was listed “as is” and over priced.  I remember when I was a kid that anything that was “Made in Japan” was considered cheap and shoddy.   Now we look for it.  Wonder if that will ever happen to China’s stuff.  Surely not.  I will have to stick with that to save my sanity.

These last items were about the weirdest things we had seen a loooooong time:

Burnt Velvet CandlesLet’s hear it for those flocked candles!!!  In their defense, you were not supposed to burn the velvet part, see:

Inside Burnt Velvet CandleYou notice that no one had the nerve to ever put a match to these things.  I think it might have given a new meaning to the fad of “burn-out velvet”.  On the other hand, just imagine these in the swingin’ bachelor pad with all the other flocked wallpaper and velvet furnishings.  The mind boggles.  I probably should apologize for that last mental image, or maybe I should have warned you.  Sorry.

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4 Responses to Summer in Full Swing

  1. Terri Gold says:

    Your humor reached new heights this week…”pond-ering, burn-out velvet…” Anyway, best use for that afghan is a dog bed or a rocking chair in the attic. BTW you are not alone in the country with insane weather (which is normal now.) We’ve also gone from 45° to 90° in the blink of an eye. Mother Nature breaks it up with torrential rain storms every few days. Climate change is not boring.

    • kathy & deb says:

      Glad you enjoyed the post; we love the puns, as if you couldn’t tell by now. Sorry you’re enjoying the “new weather” too, misery doesn’t love company in this case. Have a groovy weekend.

  2. Karen says:

    Some of these are so hopeless. It appears crafting might be more of something to do, so you take a class, and these are the resuts!

    • kathy & deb says:

      Your explanation of why these bad crafts even exist makes us feel much better than the one we subscribe to: there are people out there who should never, under any circumstances, do craft projects. Thanks for reading!

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