A Cornucopia of Craziness

Before I get all cranky about the holiday season, we have an announcement to make. Finally, we have an Etsy store!  Here’s a link or use the one on the home page of the blog under Ruffles the Ugly Bunny.   If you’ve ever wondered if some of the things we own are for sale, head on over and check it out.  The only problem we had is figuring out the shipping.  Please contact us before you pay, and we can get the exact shipping costs figured out for you without using flat rate boxes.   Now, onto our regularly scheduled post.

The holiday season is almost upon us.  I keep my eyes firmly closed while shopping at craft stores, because according to them, it’s been Christmas since September!  I’ve already heard my first Christmas carol (it happened at the beginning of November, for Pete’s sake!) so here comes all the crazy, ready or not.  I wouldn’t mind if the people who truly love the holidays start a little early; this commerce-driven frenzy has pretty much killed my love of the holidays.  I like the actual days themselves, but enough already with a two or three month buildup!

Having said all that, it doesn’t stop us from looking at all the holiday gear that the thrift stores drag out.  I’ve even been known to buy a turkey decoration so my vegetarian Thanksgiving decor isn’t totally without a nod to tradition.  Behold:

urkey candle holder     Turkey candleholder2

This is my Thanksgiving decoration–a candle holder.  I bought this little fellow because I felt sorry for him.  He knows that he isn’t cute; his expression is one of the saddest things that I’ve ever seen on something hand painted.  On the other hand, the hand painting also makes him look like he has the turkey equivalent of a goiter; it’s kind of a “win some, lose some” situation.

Oh, when will the ’70s stop torturing us?

Plastic divided tray

I’m pretty sure 40 years ago, this was a fluorescent orange and yellow color, with avocado green accents.  Thank you dishwasher for turning this divided plastic serving dish’s color setting all the way down to blah!  If you were sitting in front of the tee-vee watching football, you could have your whole Thanksgiving dinner on one plate–with nothing touching.  I would probably fill the center with potatoes or stuffing; the other compartments could hold your slice off the cranberry tube, a couple of rolls, and of course green bean casserole.  If you ate turkey and gravy, you might have other priorities; to be honest, for me one of the compartments might be full of olives!

‘Tis the season of crappy cornucopias:

Plaster cornucopia

This plaster monster would come in handy if your family gathering comes to blows.  You could take a whack at that brother-in-law that no one likes (you may substitute sister-in-law if she is more appropriate) while everyone’s attention is diverted by squabbling siblings. No one would mind if the plaster cornucopia just happened to break, well maybe your victim would, but that’s it.

Given the beauty of autumnal veggies and fruits, why don’t more people use real cornucopias, instead of the fake ones?  Next piece of evidence for the prosecution:

basket cornucopiaWe laughed at the bow on the pointy end; sort of like a bustle on a frigate.  Plus, the fruit and veggies sparkle.  If Stephenie Meyer’s vampires celebrated Thanksgiving, this would be their centerpiece.

But you know, I would take either cornucopia over this turkey:

Golden TurkeyWhere do you even start?  He is so ugly, he could be the statuette handed out for the Golden Rasberries award winner for bad movies or the Bulwer-Lytton Prize for the worst opening lines to a bad novel (just read a couple of the winners, I dare you!)  Okay, enough of those turkeys, back to our turkey!  He has a Mr. Peanut vibe too, probably related to the rectangles making up his body.  I think he was molded of heavy-duty paper, so the hope is that he is flammable.

I think we need something funny now.  Here is a pilgrim turkey:

Pilgrim turkey

When I first saw him, I thought he had a Jimmy Durante nose, but no, it was that strange fold of skin above the beak sticking out like a word balloon.  At least this turkey is no dummy; if you look like the pilgrims, you might just get out of November alive!

We had to laugh at the oddness of this blowup turkey:

Fall Holiday displayIf you’ve never seen a real, live turkey, you might think they look like this.  His little kitty friend in the foreground is ever so much cuter!

Kathy just remembered that she has a recipe pamphlet put out by Baker’s Coconut:

Turkey cake

They have cakes for every holiday and we should include the appropriate cake for the next holiday cycle of posts–this is their Thanksgiving cake.  This turkey is pretty funny with the candy corn feathers.  Much better than the other turkeys in the post.

Last, but certainly not least, is this Thanksgiving hat display:

Thanksgiving headgear

This might be my favorite Thanksgiving display ever!  The turkey hat makes me think of the Friends episode where Joey gets the turkey stuck on his head (The One with All the Thanksgivings).  I still laugh whenever I think of that.  You could make the eighteen hours you spend getting ready for Thanksgiving a little happier if you were to wear one of these hats.

If you have a yen for our leather picture frame:

Vintage Leather Frame

Enter the giveaway by 9pm MT November 28th by leaving a comment here or on Facebook.

Happy Thanksgiving to our US readers.  We hope you spend the day with someone you love!  Sorry we forgot to send wishes to our Canadian readers–hope you had a wonderful holiday.

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10 Responses to A Cornucopia of Craziness

  1. Anny says:

    Congrats on your Etsy shop!

    • kathy & deb says:

      Thanks Anny. It’s something that’s been in the works for a long time; we have lots of merchandise so to speak, but needed a shop. Etsy seemed like a place to start.

  2. Barbara Forde says:

    Wierd Turkeys…Looks like you had a great time shopping 🙂

    • kathy & deb says:

      Hey Barbara–at first I thought you wrote “Wild Turkey” which would be better than our turkeys! We had a wheee of a time shopping lately. There is so much weirdness out there. Thanks for reading!

  3. Oh wow… you certainly find some interesting Thanksgiving ‘decor’ I can definitely see why the golden turkey ended up at the thrift store. If I was given it as a present, I would have taken the whole thing to the closet thrift store. As a side note, I still have my clay turkey that I made when I was in first grade. And it graces our vegetarian table every year.

  4. Diane Rhodes says:

    I want one of those turkey hats! Oh, and I’m still eyeballing the leather frame!

    • kathy & deb says:

      Hey, if you want the hats, they’re at the thrift store downtown on College, next Ace Hardware. Be prepared, they’re probably spendy for a thrift store–but very fun!

  5. Andrea says:

    How could I not stop by and visit a post with a title like that? Those turkey hats are among the most ridiculous things I’ve seen. I could see the entire Griswold family sportin those!
    Cute things in your Etsy shop, by the way.

    • kathy & deb says:

      Thanks so much Andrea for your kind comments! Of course the Griswolds would wear those hats–that would be perfect!

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