Tropical Tacky

After Deb complained that she had to go shopping without me, she should understand that I was hard at work, combing the island for blog fodder.  Try explaining why you are taking pictures of something quite so hideous to my very “normal” Mother-in-Law, who was traveling with us.  For the record, I adore my MIL, but it has taken years for her to even begin to understand my fascination with thrift stores and garage sales.  When we were first married, I told her that a lamp I had scavenged from the dump and refurbished “came from a little boutique south of town!”  After 26 years, she now humors me.

When I saw this place, I forced Hubby to do a U-turn, in a rental car, onto a tiny little street, because I knew I needed a photo.

Then I had to explain to the proprietress just why I was taking a picture of her sign.  Darn SLR camera is so hard to hide!  By the way, went in and it didn’t live up to my expectations, but you gotta try.

We spend a lot of time deploring people’s choices in travel souvenirs, but if they insist on offering specimens like this, sooner or later some tasteless schmuck is going to bring it home.

This was not at a thrift store, but right in one of the Hawaiian Craft Markets.  Truly, is there anyone out there who could display this ANYWHERE without being at least a teensy tiny bit embarrassed by it?  I certainly hope not.

I don’t know who this poor fish ticked off, but no one deserves to have a light bulb stuffed down his gullet and hung from the ceiling.  Sounds like excessive punishment to me.

Maybe they could peel off some of the dollar bills and buy a real light.  I know, not really the Hawaiian style, and I have to admit the food was fabulous, and the view of the ocean made it all worth while, but still, that poor fish, doomed for eternity to look out at it.

While there, we learned that the number one tourist destination for Hawaiians is Las Vegas.  They work all year, and go blow their money playing slots in one weekend.  Well, this gambling Mama was going to be dressed for success:

Look closely at the print.  Who knew you could dress for roulette?

Guess it turned out NOT to be her lucky MuMu, as there it was, in one of the thrift stores.  What comes to Vegas, stays in Vegas.

I must admit, that I found this next thing kinda more amusing than terrible, but I have a soft spot for Tikis, and where else could you find a candle this big?

You could burn the inner, replaceable candle, so the outside would remain intact.  The whole thing was at least three feet tall.  According to the shop keeper, it has actually appeared in movies and TV shows, so keep your eyes peeled for it on the next episode of Hawaii Five-O.  No, not the new one, the old one, or Blue Hawaii, or whatever.

I loved this next sign, but after eating at the restaurant, I wanted to complain about false advertising:

The closest the women came to being wild, were two waitresses who got up to do the Hula, but not one naked chef did I see.  I was hoping for cute Hawaiian guys.  By the way, this was another fabulous restaurant.  Hawaiian sweet pork.  Yum.

It seemed to be Kismet, but after we got back, we saw a couple of things that would have made great souvenirs, but I didn’t see these over there!  First up, this adorable doll:

Not the best shot, but the person in charge of the showcase was cranky that day, so we didn’t get her out for a good picture.  In Hawaii, these things are terribly expensive, as was this one, so save those vintage Hula girls.

And lastly, we both thought this was cute:

My little grass shack wind chime.  Must have been a bear to pack, but it makes you smile and wish for island breezes.

We settled for bringing back a suitcase full of Hawaiian shirts for hubby, pearls for me, and a camera full of fun memories.  Thanks for traveling with us today, and return your seats to their upright position.  We are back in CO, except for Deb, who is now in Florida!!

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7 Responses to Tropical Tacky

  1. Matty says:

    Aloha ʻoe, aloha ʻoe, so much tacky to see. 😉 But I do love that Hula Girl! Let’s hope Deb finds some Floridian ‘treasures’. – Matty

    • kathydeb says:

      I am sure Deb will come through!! She always does. I know for a fact garage sales are on her list this morning.

  2. Connie says:

    What a great store sign. Yes, your hubby did the right thing by turning around so you could snap a photo of it. It kind of makes me wonder if there is more than one ‘Second Hand Rose’ thrift store out there?

  3. Connie says:

    Oh, I almost forgot. My hubby wanted to make sure that you and your family were safe… no bizarre accidents after you took the picture of the tiki candle? And to prove that his brain remembered some pieces of pop culture, he said, “I remember what happened in the Brady Bunch episode when they went to Hawaii.

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